"The Last of The Summer Whine" had a full quota of 5 marshals for the Formula 1 and Sidecar Races on Saturday afternoon. Traffic congestion in Foxdale City-Centre delayed the arrival of 3 of our body by nearly half an hour, but the post was fully manned by the time the roads closed at 1.15pm.

We were soon alerted to the fact that an undercover cell from The Purple Helmets had positioned themselves in a neighbouring hedge-back. Several of them had tried to baffle us by wearing just Wallace & Gromit boxers and sunglasses, but we saw through their thin disguises - unfortunately. They might well have deceived us successfully, were it not for the fact that one of their members chose to wear his boxers to shade his eyes.

It was obvious that they had heard previous reports, and were keen to catch a glimpse of The Famous Worm of Gorse Lea performing his cunning stunts. They were denied a sighting of this natural phenomenon by heroic action from The Vigilante Thrush, who unflinchingly patrolled the kerbs on both sides of the Course, despite blatant attempts by Richard Quayle, Nick Crowe and Pascal Hatchet to wing the plucky little fellow.

By the end of the Formula 1 Race we were all a little peckish. The Antrim Men went back to Cronk Brec for afternoon tea. Those remaining at the post finished off a generous helping of Mrs Berrie's delicious home-made cakes - and The Purple Helmets in their boxers were finished off by the advance guard of the Gorse Lea Midges, and had to escape via The Hope on their Hondas. .....So "Do The Purple Helmets wear Honda Pants?" and "Do they live in Hope?"

The Best Anagram from the letters in "Gorse Lea" is still "A Sore Leg", which is a lame excuse for finishing my report.